A close friend of mine once asked me how does a typical mallu look and behave like. Being a Mallu being asked to define one of his own species is a tough one to answer without being biased. My answer to her was something like this:
(Please note I dont indent to hurt anyone with the following stanzas, its all in a lighter vein)
A typical mallu girl is proud of belonging from Kerala. She believes its her birthright to become a nurse.They are generally very talkative and big gossip queens.Oiling her hair with coconut oil is a must. But truly results are indeed good with majority of them having long and sustainable dark hair. She is proud to come from kerala where female population is more than male population than any part of India. Anyone who has opportunities to learn further goes ahead and does MSc, MCom,MCA, MBA..etc.
Even though gold is liked by womenfolk at large, this Keralite has a penchant for coating herself in gold. On all occassions she believes in wearing gold, head to toe. On her wedding, she is supposed to bring home gold not in grams but in tolas. When she washes her hair, she believes in leaving it open and also using 2 strands of hair from near her ears to tie a knot encompassing them all. Set saree or set mundu(dhoti) is one piece of clothing she is really proud to wear to any occasion be it wedding, funeral. Dhawani is another clothing she looks really good in, but its fast disappearing. Be it Catholic, Hindu or Muslim, basically all mallu girls are god fearing.
A typical mallu guy has a moustache. Believes, its a sign of masculinity. Who will tell him the hindrance it causes while smooching...lol...He believes a lungi or dhoti is the best piece of clothing invented. He wears EastMan Color lungis at home and offwhite or plain white dhoti even to work. Drinking and smoking is his birthright. Its derogatory to even ask if he indulges in such vices. He forms a union wherever he works in kerala.Knows all the loopholes in the system to evade work and fight for his rights and blalantly ignore his duties, though the same mallu slogs like a dog in Gulf or places except Kerala. He believes in remittance of money to his household and wants the best for his family, a palatial house, car and educating his kids.
Most of them consider shaving as an unnecessary daily chore and would like to chuck it, given an opportunity. Like gossiping and also like calling Kerala, God's Own Country. Likes discussing politics between Communists and Congress, so the Kerala Govt changes every 5 yrs.
Kids in Kerala get up every morning to check if the buses are working, if he/she doesnt find vehicular traffic on the road for 2 minutes, he/she goes back to sleep as its a strike day and there is no school or college. This happens at least twice in a week still Kerala has the maximum literacy rate in India.
(Please note I dont indent to hurt anyone with the following stanzas, its all in a lighter vein)
A typical mallu girl is proud of belonging from Kerala. She believes its her birthright to become a nurse.They are generally very talkative and big gossip queens.Oiling her hair with coconut oil is a must. But truly results are indeed good with majority of them having long and sustainable dark hair. She is proud to come from kerala where female population is more than male population than any part of India. Anyone who has opportunities to learn further goes ahead and does MSc, MCom,MCA, MBA..etc.
Even though gold is liked by womenfolk at large, this Keralite has a penchant for coating herself in gold. On all occassions she believes in wearing gold, head to toe. On her wedding, she is supposed to bring home gold not in grams but in tolas. When she washes her hair, she believes in leaving it open and also using 2 strands of hair from near her ears to tie a knot encompassing them all. Set saree or set mundu(dhoti) is one piece of clothing she is really proud to wear to any occasion be it wedding, funeral. Dhawani is another clothing she looks really good in, but its fast disappearing. Be it Catholic, Hindu or Muslim, basically all mallu girls are god fearing.
A typical mallu guy has a moustache. Believes, its a sign of masculinity. Who will tell him the hindrance it causes while smooching...lol...He believes a lungi or dhoti is the best piece of clothing invented. He wears EastMan Color lungis at home and offwhite or plain white dhoti even to work. Drinking and smoking is his birthright. Its derogatory to even ask if he indulges in such vices. He forms a union wherever he works in kerala.Knows all the loopholes in the system to evade work and fight for his rights and blalantly ignore his duties, though the same mallu slogs like a dog in Gulf or places except Kerala. He believes in remittance of money to his household and wants the best for his family, a palatial house, car and educating his kids.
Most of them consider shaving as an unnecessary daily chore and would like to chuck it, given an opportunity. Like gossiping and also like calling Kerala, God's Own Country. Likes discussing politics between Communists and Congress, so the Kerala Govt changes every 5 yrs.
Kids in Kerala get up every morning to check if the buses are working, if he/she doesnt find vehicular traffic on the road for 2 minutes, he/she goes back to sleep as its a strike day and there is no school or college. This happens at least twice in a week still Kerala has the maximum literacy rate in India.
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